Whenever the topic of video game movies comes to light, many examples can be brought to the forefront, like the Super Mario Bros. Movie and its colorful animation or the Sonic the Hedgehog films and their array of delightful campiness and action. The Borderlands film will never be held to this same level, however, due to it being without a doubt, one of the most poorly made, shoddily plotted, and lazily written films of the year.
The film kicks off when bounty hunter Lilith, played by Cate Blanchett, returns to her home planet of Pandora after hearing that the chaotic Tiny Tina, played by Ariana Greenblatt, who is the daughter of unstable headman of the dominant Atlas Corporation, Deukalian Atlas, played by Edgar Ramirez, went missing.
This was performed by a soldier named Roland and his Psycho sidekick Krieg, played by Kevin Hart and Florian Munteanu respectively, who had formerly been a part of Atlas’s secret army, the Crimson Lance, while the ladder was trapped in a mysterious tank.
Lilith later finds out that Atlas believes Tina is the only person capable enough to open a secret vault of ancient technology made by the Eridians, the people of Pandora’s lost civilization. With the help of Lilith’s mother, Dr. Patricia Tannis, played by Jaime Lee Curtis, the team of misfits attempt to defeat Atlas’ Psychos.
While on paper the plot may sound decently intriguing, it is executed in the most sterile and generic way possible, with each scene including needless exposition that piles on detail after detail with none of it feeling rewarding by the end. This, coupled with a bloated 101 minute runtime, leaves most scenes feeling like an eternity, such as the final battle against Atla’s goons or the lazy low-brow joke revolving around Claptrap.
The film’s humor, which had been attempting to recreate Borderlands’ signature crude and pop-culture filled wit, is at best eye-rolling and at worst exhausting to sit through. It really does feel like the screenwriters at times were trying to mimic the self-aware jokes, unnecessary cursing, and cheeky double-entendres from the likes of better films such as Deadpool or Guardians of the Galaxy, but to no avail.
Additionally, the special effects had me questioning where the estimated $100 million dollar budget was really going due to the array of terribly rendered shots not only shown in space, but on Pandora throughout. The characters had overall been poorly adapted from the original games, as their personalities, ages, and motivations were either changed or non-existent, making it very hard to root for any of their achievements in the film. Even the ensemble of A-list stars did a very disappointing job in making these characters interesting or quotable, except for Jack Black, the only actor in the film who put any effort into the role despite the bad script.
Overall, I give this film a 1 out of 5 stars, as the entire experience had me worried about the state of not only video game movies as a whole, but for the entire future of the Borderlands franchise and how they will recover from such a massive misfire.
